It was for one of my father's best friends, Shirley Gray. He was a legendary coach and teacher in Culpeper for over 40 years. I grew up celebrating Thanksgiving, birthdays, and singing Christmas carols with him. The last time I hugged him was at my Graduation Party at Riverside last year.
Funerals are not my thing. Whose are they, really? What do you say? How do you act? I know I laugh at most situations, but funerals do get to me. When I see the anguish, sadness, and loneliness in my fellow humans' faces and eyes, I want to help them. But, grief is an emotion too.
The last funeral I was at was almost 5 years ago. It was Grandpa's funeral. His passing onto heaven has been one of the most pinnacle parts of my life. At the end of his funeral, I was angry at God! How could the God I loved so much cause so many people to be in pain? How could the God I loved so much allow cancer? How could the God I love so much allow my Grandfather, who humbly served God as a minister, have cancer overwhelm his body? Needless-to-say, I walked out of the 2nd memorial service for my Grandfather angry with God at not knowing his plan or understanding his intentions. Then, the journey began...
Over the next 5 years, I discovered, lived, took 2 steps forward and then 1 back, tried, observed, believed, pursued, zigzagged, discussed, followed, lead, and ultimately lived to get to where I am today along my spiritual journey or path.
Today I walked out of the funeral with my head up. While I remember Shirley and his influence on so many students and athletes, I fully, unashamedly know that there is a God and he has a plan. I never felt anger, but relief that I have a friend in Jesus. I never felt defeated, but a victor that I knew one day I would meet Shirley again. I never felt hopeless, because I saw 4 beautiful grandchildren that represent the circle of life.
Today, was the 2nd time in 5 years that a pastor pronounced at the end of the a funeral "Well done, good and faithful servant!"
Moral of the Story: Ruminate on this.
I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned...
ReplyDeleteWe are freely given God's grace not because of what we've done, but because of who He is. What a blessing it is to spend our time here on Earth trying to be a good and faithful servant.
Keep up the blog! I love peeking in on your life.