I'm surrounded by Bridal Showers, Weddings, friends in on/off relationships, friends in long distance relationships, friends in loving relationships, friends in not so loving relationships.
I am happy for my friends. I support my friends. But, it's quite clear that I'm the 'single' friend.
The facts:
3 weddings I'm in this year
3 other weddings to attend this year (so far)
5 bridal showers
2 bachelorette parties
1 drawer cleaned out and designated for 'wedding mail'
tons of $ spent on weddings
5 million planning emails
countless memories
A good friend asked me this weekend whether I'd like to have a relationship. Truth be told, "sure, sometimes." But, not really.
Yes, I'd love have someone to share my experiences, travel with, challenge me, and to enjoy life with. But, guess what? I'm doing a pretty good job of doing that on my own. So, until, the Mr. Right comes along, I'll do it my way.
I refuse to half-live in a half relationship. I refuse to settle for someone by default. For example, the eligible bachelor pool is limited in Culpeper.
I believe one must know one's self before entering in to a relationship in order to compliment one another. I cannot find myself in Mr. Right. I must find myself within. I continue that journey, now. I know it's a lifelong journey. But, as T always says I have the rest of my life to be married. I'm enjoying the stage I'm in now.
A gorgeous friend sent me this passage today...
"i realized something about my life and the choices i made with men. maybe it's the same with the choices i've made as a whole, because if you look in my closet you'll see what i'm talking about. i have pants i've worn only once, because they show a little sock--too short. they were a good bargain. or that blouse that itches, but i can't throw it away because i didn't get it on sale. there's that dress that makes me feel like a sofa in an old bat's living room. i don't know why i bought it. the music in some of those places, you'll buy anything.
my point is, there's only a few things that i like all the way. one hundred percent. my soft blue dress. my lounging pants. had them for years, and they're still what i reach for when i want to be comfortable. everything else i like maybe 50 percent, or 75 percent, or 15 percent. and it's been the same thing with the men i've been with. fifty percent maybe. sixty-five percent.
this is what i know. don't settle for 40, 50, even 80 percent. a relationship--it shouldn't be too small or too tight or even a little scratchy. it shouldn't be embarrassing or uncomfortable or downright ugly. it shouldn't take up space in your closet out of a guilty conscience or a moment of desire. do you hear me? it should be perfect for you. it should be lasting.
wait. wait for 100 percent. "
my point is, there's only a few things that i like all the way. one hundred percent. my soft blue dress. my lounging pants. had them for years, and they're still what i reach for when i want to be comfortable. everything else i like maybe 50 percent, or 75 percent, or 15 percent. and it's been the same thing with the men i've been with. fifty percent maybe. sixty-five percent.
this is what i know. don't settle for 40, 50, even 80 percent. a relationship--it shouldn't be too small or too tight or even a little scratchy. it shouldn't be embarrassing or uncomfortable or downright ugly. it shouldn't take up space in your closet out of a guilty conscience or a moment of desire. do you hear me? it should be perfect for you. it should be lasting.
wait. wait for 100 percent. "
Moral of the Story: I choose to be patient. Pray. And, wait. My time will come. I'm in this stage of life for a reason. I will grow. I will not settle.
Theme song of Ellen and Anni and Logan
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